God Bless Eastern Europe (Or: Handjob on the Side, Please)

A Dialogue between myself and two charming Russian gals (we’ll call them Strelka and Sveltana, because I’m not concerned with accurate reporting or political correctness) who came in to shop today at the store where I work:

Strelka: Ah, this Gucci watch? How much is?

Me: Let me check! Hm, it appears we have it marked at $500.00.

Strelka: [Something in Russian to Sveltana]

Sveltana: [Responds in kind]

Strelka: How much discount you give? Maybe for 300…

Me: 300? I don’t think I can go that low without asking the consignor… I could give you 20% off; 375?

[More Russian]

Sveltana: What about 75 and handjob?

I nearly spilled my drink. Also, Strelka opted not to use our fitting rooms, but rather to simply change in front of the mirror, which I absolutely loved.

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